How To Play Bigger, Lead Authentically, and Make More Money w/ Megan Lane

Show notes as a general guide below. Somewhat in order and not written in perfect grammar because we want you to actually listen to the show!

Show Time Stamps:

• Living in an Answered Prayer [00:01:45]
• Finding the Sweet Spot [00:03:50]
• Defining Moment [00:04:17]
• Defining moment [00:05:17]
• Micro defining moments [00:08:39]
• Perfectionism [00:10:42]
• Healing from eating disorder and self-image issues [00:11:06]
• Comparison and finding inspiration [00:14:31]
• The sister wound and celebrating other women [00:15:32]
• Celebrating Authenticity [00:16:37]
• Choosing What to Share [00:20:04]
• Finding the Sweet Spot [00:21:36]
• The Meaning of Life and Playing Big [00:22:15]
• Self-Censorship and Playing Small [00:25:22]
• Regret Minimization and Playing Big [00:26:15]
• Playing Big [00:27:07]
• Capacity vs Potential [00:29:15]
• Playing Big in Service [00:31:49]
• The difference between giving from love and giving for love [00:32:30]
• The personal nature of giving and finding what lights you up [00:33:58]
• The benefits of giving and random acts of kindness [00:36:00]
• Finding Balance [00:37:50]
• Surrendering to Expansion [00:40:18]
• Human Design [00:42:55]
• Finding Balance and Human Design [00:43:32]
• Money Beliefs and Building Wealth [00:44:48]
• Abundance and Authenticity [00:47:30]
• Importance of Understanding Taxes [00:49:19]
• The Importance of Fun in Life [00:51:04]
• The Thrive Project [00:53:57]

Connect with Megan Lane on Instagram
Connect with Sebastian on Instagram
SebastianNaum.com

Below is a transcript of the video podcast created by Seb’s Robot buddy, Zekton. He tends to make mistakes so please forgive him if you find errors or some funky sounding sentences. For the real deal, watch the video or click on your favorite audio Podcast platform above! Enjoy!

Sebastian Naum (00:00:01) – Megan, welcome to the show.
Megan Lane (00:00:14) – Hi. Thank you for having me.
Sebastian Naum (00:00:16) – I’m glad you just told me right before we started recording that I can’t ask you anything that requires a lot of brain power. So I’ll, I’ll do my best.
Megan Lane (00:00:22) – Easy questions are only today is late.
Sebastian Naum (00:00:25) – . Yeah. So we’re recording. You’re in London right now. This is actually like the earliest show that I’ve recorded, so I just did a full beer bong of coffee, so I’m, I’m okay.
Megan Lane (00:00:34) – You’re good. I’m actually Manchester, I’m at home at my parents in Manchester.
Sebastian Naum (00:00:39) – Beautiful, beautiful. Love that. So before I ask you anything, well we’re gonna talk about truly tapping into your own power, playing bigger roles in life, making more money, feeling aligned, all that good stuff. But what was your last Oh shit moment. What is the last thing that you can think of?
Megan Lane (00:00:53) – ? Um, I think this weekend I had an Oh shit moment. A good o shit moment though. Yeah.
Sebastian Naum (00:01:02) – Yeah. Good.
Megan Lane (00:01:03) – Yeah.
Sebastian Naum (00:01:03) – Could be good, could be bad. Whatever you want it to be.
Megan Lane (00:01:05) – Because I was in this apartment, which I bought last year and I was so excited when I bought it cuz my first property, and it was like a big moment for me. It was like a single mom, um, doing my own thing. This is something that I had on my vision board. I was like, I’m gonna buy my own property. And when it happened, when I actually came to buy it and it was going through, I had a huge financial, like crisis happen where I found out that my accountants had fucked up my account. So I went into like full on panic, like, is this the right decision? But it was already going through and I didn’t wanna pull out and it, it actually turned into like a big kind of drama when it was something that I really wanted to like cherish and enjoy.
Megan Lane (00:01:45) – And this weekend I just had a moment, I was like in here with my daughter and we were just like dancing around and I just had a, oh shit. Like I am living inside an answered prayer and I’m worrying about what it is that I want next in life and I’m stressing about like, I don’t have this yet and I don’t have that yet. And I just had to catch myself and be like, Hey, like you prayed for this and you are in it. Like you’re dancing around inside the vision. Oh shit, . Like, notice it, soak it up. You know?
Sebastian Naum (00:02:14) – That resonates so much. That’s literally the story of my life, Megan. Like everything, first of all, congratulations. It’s amazing. Beautiful. It’s so cool. And for me it’s like I, I I constantly do that. I, it’s just a, it is this loop that I have to con that I have to be really aware of that I’m doing up. I, you know, I achieve something and then it’s, and then I’m worried about the next thing. So, you know, I’ve talked about it with various people, including my coach slash therapist. I’ve talked about it with my mother who’s also a coach. And it’s just like, is it, is this this, is it the same theme as this sort of not enoughness Right? Or is it something else? It’s just like an interesting, uh, thing. Yeah, because I really do that.
Megan Lane (00:02:56) – Yeah. Yeah. I feel that it’s like a thread of just like constant, oh. I mean it’s the, the world we live in as well. Right. We’re just, especially with social media comparison and this like having this hunger for more, I think that in life you can find this sweet spot where, oh, you have to kind of find the sweet spot where it’s like, okay, I want more and it’s okay to want more. Yeah. And it actually gives you a sense of purpose and a reason to get out of bed in the morning to want more out of life and to have that like inner passion and hunger, but also to be like fully grateful and present and like, just in where you are with so much appreciation and gratitude and constantly reminding yourself of how far you’ve come without just trying to like disregard it all and be like, yeah, I did all that, but that means nothing now because there’s the next level. And it’s like, right. There’s a sweet spot in the middle where it’s like, this is so fucking amazing and it’s so enough and I want more, you know,
Sebastian Naum (00:03:50) – That like, I picture like a Venn diagram. That sweet spot though. Like, it just seems really difficult to hit, but how I’m going for that sweet spot. But yeah. Uh, so, um, before we go into all this, I wanna ask you, where did the all this all come from? Have you always had this sort of passion for empowering people, particularly women? Um, or was there some sort of, uh, moment in life, like big defining moment that changed everything?
Megan Lane (00:04:17) – Yeah, no, there was definitely a defining moment because before I started doing all of this, which was probably around like six or seven years ago now, I was not, yeah, it was not in me. Like, I don’t get me wrong, I was a, a kind person who liked to give and I cared about people and I’ve always been empathetic and stuff, but I didn’t have any kind of purpose towards helping other women. And I’d spent my life with an eating disorder, had bulimia since I was literally like 11 or 12 years old. And, um, then I went to uni. I did a lot of drugs. I’d never done drugs before, but I got caught up in like a big drug scene at uni. And, um, then I developed really bad anxiety and panic attacks. So my journey of healing was like, I got to a point where I was like, I’m gonna end up kind of killing myself with through these behaviors.
Megan Lane (00:05:17) – Like, the eating disorder was so bad, like physically, emotionally, mentally, it was just so draining and I just couldn’t carry on with it. And I was like, there has to be, you know, another way. And I had this like, very kind of spiritual moment and we’ve talked about church and like how I like rejected the idea of God because church was not a nice experience for me. Um, so the defining moment for me was going through all of this painful shit and not feeling safe to like be me in the world, being so insecure, needing constant validation, getting so lost in just searching outside of myself for, for love. Um, and then one day being so at rock bottom that I just like looked up and was like, if there’s a God, please fucking help me. Like this is the time, this is when I need you.
Megan Lane (00:06:07) – Like I surrender. And um, that was it. That was it. That was like the moment everything started changing cuz I really felt that like, and like when you truly surrender, there’s like an energy of light I give up, you know, it’s like a and you let something else take over something that has Yeah. Much higher intelligence than your little human P brain could ever have. And, um, yeah. And that’s when it all started to change. And it was that journey of finding spirituality and realizing the magic and then accessing my own inner power and then being like, holy fuck, I’m the creator of my own life. And this whole time I’ve been choosing to do drugs and choosing to make myself sick and choosing all of these destructive behaviors. And it was like, the power is now back in my hands and how, what am I gonna do with it?
Megan Lane (00:06:54) – And I think when I realized that it is like anything, when you realize something like you wanna just go tell the whole world, right? You wanna go tell everyone, it’s like you’ve cracked the code, you’ve got the secret , and it’s like, everybody listen. So that’s why it became for me, like, I think, um, even talking about it now, like I could cry because it, when I think about women feeling like I did, that is, that’s the ugh. Like, I feel like I’m being stabbed in the heart. Like any woman that feels lost, any woman that feels insecure alone is outsourcing love, needs validation is kind of abandoning herself, um, in the process. Like I just feel so much empathy for those women because I know how it feels and I still, I still have moments where I have those emotions and those feelings, you know?
Sebastian Naum (00:07:44) – Yeah. That’s so powerful. I actually got goosebumps when you were telling me part of that story because, so I quoted, I, I have in my notes, uh, I quoted a book and Will, you described something very important from that same book actually, which is, um, Maram Williamson’s A Return to Love mm-hmm. . And it’s based on a course of miracles. And if so, what you talked about that sort of moment. It’s, it’s big in that those teachings of a course of miracles, of it’s sort of on your knees moment. It’s a moment where you hit that rock bottom and you sort of, and you surrender to something bigger than yourself, right? Yeah. Um, and that’s when things start to fall into place once you actually truly surrender and you have that moment. So that’s, that’s super powerful. Yeah. Great. Um, you know, what’s interesting about defining moments is I feel that, I feel like I, at least for me, I think that I have defining moments constantly.
Sebastian Naum (00:08:39) – They happen all the time mm-hmm. , but they’re not really defining moments without the power to integrate the lessons. It’s as if every single like little lessons that you’re getting, either, either daily or weekly or whatever, if you can integrate those, you would be having, or I would be having micro defining moments all the time that could just be con continue to up-level your life. But, um, it’s just like, do you feel like, do, do you have a, a way to, do you have like a little trick or something that you do when you learn lessons, when something you get these little hits, these little universal hits from God, the universe, whatever you wanna call it, that you are able to use and integrate on on a daily?
Megan Lane (00:09:19) – Yeah, I guess. But I guess that’s like, um, it, it becomes very natural I think when you first have that, that that self-awareness and you’re like constantly watching what you’re doing and you’re like, oh my God, I just said that. And what does that mean? And that links back to this wound and you are very like, aware of it. And I think over time when you’ve been self-aware for a long time, that those things integrate very easily and you just embody it. Like, you just realize it, learn it, take hold of it and say, okay, that’s who I wanna be now. That’s how I’m gonna show up. And you just embody it. You just, it just becomes such a natural thing. I don’t think I think about it now.
Sebastian Naum (00:09:56) – That’s great.
Megan Lane (00:09:57) – .
Sebastian Naum (00:09:58) – That’s amazing. So it’s practice for you, it’s just practice.
Megan Lane (00:10:01) – It’s practice. Yeah. It’s practice, yeah. A hundred percent.
Sebastian Naum (00:10:04) – Mm. Yeah. Yeah. Um, you talked a little bit right there about, uh, comparisons. It’s a huge thing. It’s something we do so much and I’d love to see some of your posts that you do on Instagram and you do some of these posts that are these sort of like Instagram versus reality type stuff, but it’s, it’s, it’s in a way some, you’re actually very funny on Instagram all the time, but some of these are not, they’re not necessarily, they’re not necessarily meant to be funny. They’re actually meant to show how we normalize perfect lives and perfectionism and all that stuff. So, um, how do you help people that you mentor get out, get out of those cycles of self comparison and in comparison, comparing ourselves to perfection on, on social?
Megan Lane (00:10:42) – I think that the key with like, I had a big perfectionism problem for a long time, and that was kind of like the mask that I hid behind when I was feeling really super insecure. Um,
Sebastian Naum (00:10:52) – Me too.
Megan Lane (00:10:54) – Did you,
Sebastian Naum (00:10:55) – I’m a recovering perfectionist.
Megan Lane (00:10:57) – Are you a perfectionist? That’s also your star sign though.
Sebastian Naum (00:10:59) – Recovering
Megan Lane (00:11:00) – recovery
Sebastian Naum (00:11:03) – . Oh, is that a Libra thing?
Megan Lane (00:11:05) – Yeah,
Sebastian Naum (00:11:05) – I think,
Megan Lane (00:11:06) – Yeah, that’s what I’ve heard. Um, and, um, yeah, I think the, for me it was the, um, wow. I used to edit my pictures so badly and that’s why I do the side by sides now because I’m like, there’s almost a part of me that feels so guilty for what I put out into the world and the impact I would’ve had on people that now it’s like, I try to like undo that and like show people it in a way is like me trying to make up for what I did. Um, even though I do forgive myself and I didn’t know any better at the time. I was doing my best. Yeah,
Sebastian Naum (00:11:41) – Yeah.
Megan Lane (00:11:42) – But definitely think that, um, I used to edit my photos. I used to edit my body as well. Like, I would like pinch my waist in and make my butt bigger and do all these things on photos. Um, and what I realized is that, um, I was living like a double life. And I remember my sister, I remember a moment when my sister, we were on holiday and I had really, really ba bulimia. I was going to the toilet after every single meal. I was completely lost. I was crying every time I looked in the mirror. I was just like, just, I, I like loathed myself and it was such a hard feeling. But online I had this image of like, absolute perfection. And I remember my sister and I, I didn’t get it. Like, I wasn’t self-aware enough to understand that there was this huge like, double life going on. I just felt lost and didn’t know why, you know? And my sister, we were in the pool and she was like, I just have to like tell you the person that you are on Instagram is not the person in front of me. And like, this can’t be good for you. It can’t be healthy. Like, how do you feel? And I just sat with it and was like, shit, ,
Sebastian Naum (00:12:45) – ,
Megan Lane (00:12:45) – What have I done? And I, I remember that night I went onto my Instagram and I, I’m the kind of person that when I realized something, that’s it. Like, I’m in, I’m done. Like, I’m just, all I need is that one moment of realization and then it’s, it’s go time. Like I’m not hanging about. And I, I went home back to the hotel room that night and deleted all of my selfies. I deleted all of them. And um, and I was like, I’m starting over. I’m doing it again. Because what happens with comparison is you, you reject yourself every time you compare yourself to someone else and say, they’re better than me. Or like, there, she’s, she’s this and I’m not that. And you, you put yourself on that counter. You put ’em on a pedestal. Like you are in a state of self-rejection and it just, there’s, there’s nothing God can come from it. Nothing. God can come from putting your, making your life that perfect. Um, and it’s those moments like in private where you’re on your own and it is like you are comparing your real, true, authentic, messy, raw, beautiful human self who is more than enough in every moment, um, just because she is or he is, um, to this cur curated, impossible standard. And you, I think comparing yourself to other people is painful, but comparing yourself to a an impossible version of yourself is even more painful.
Sebastian Naum (00:14:11) – That I that’s what I was gonna ask you. So there’s the comparison in versus this perfect facade or Yeah. Right. There’s that, then there’s the comparison of someone that you really just aspire to do and be like, and what do you think about that? Because it, how, how do you, where where’s that sweet spot between comparison
Megan Lane (00:14:31) – Spot? That’s the sweet spot because,
Sebastian Naum (00:14:33) – And using it as an expander, you know, because
Megan Lane (00:14:35) – It’s inspiration,
Sebastian Naum (00:14:36) – Right?
Megan Lane (00:14:37) – Because that, that’s the sweet spot is did you , where did you get?
Sebastian Naum (00:14:40) – I, I dropped, I dropped.
Megan Lane (00:14:44) – Um,
Sebastian Naum (00:14:45) – You drink water, I’m gonna keep drinking coffee for London time.
Megan Lane (00:14:51) – . Um, yeah, the sweet spot is where you take the inspiration that you need and you, you, you, it doesn’t, you don’t make it mean anything about you. You don’t make their life mean anything about yours. So you’re not internalizing anything. It’s like they’re over there, they’re doing their thing. Good for them, celebrate them. That’s a huge energy. Like celebrate them.
Sebastian Naum (00:15:15) – Yeah. That’s big. Yeah. That’s hard to do. That can be really hard to do.
Megan Lane (00:15:20) – It’s hard. And again, that’s one thing that takes a lot of practice. It’s like, yeah, actually, especially with women. Like, we have a huge sister wound, so we have been pitted against each other for thousands of years. Like to, what’s
Sebastian Naum (00:15:31) – The sister wound?
Megan Lane (00:15:32) – The sister wound is the wound that has been created between, between women because of the patriarchy. Okay. So because men were, because women have been oppressed and because men were given this kind of like, place at the top, there were so few spaces left for women that we kind of turn on each other for them. Yeah.
Sebastian Naum (00:15:49) – Yeah. It’s compete
Megan Lane (00:15:52) – It go, it, it’s really deep. I mean, going back to times where it actually ratting each other out was a survival thing because women were being burned at the stake. Like it’s deep, it’s deep, deep ancestral wounding. And we, it shows up in this day and age is like comparison and gossip and bitchiness and whatever else. But it runs so deep. And that is the wound. And I think that one of the, the most powerful ways to heal the sister wound is start to celebrate other women and know that there is enough space for all of us. And, um, that was one thing that changed my life. I used to, when I was insecure, comparing myself to other women, then bitching about them and gossiping about them was a symptom of that wound massively. And my life and my success changed so much when I decided that I was gonna start championing other women and being like, well fucking done.
Megan Lane (00:16:37) – And if she can do it, then so can I. And that’s incredible. Yeah. And then like, also like asking her like, how did you get to where you are? Like what can I learn from you? Yeah. And what you realize is the most successful women, the majority of them, the ones that I’ve come across anyway, they are in such an abundant mindset that they want you to win too. Because they’re not like, you know, oh, this is, they’re not gatekeeping. They’re not being like, oh, this is my success and you, you know, you do your thing and I’m not telling you how I got there. Right. True. Success is like this abundance of like, there’s enough for everyone and they’re the most successful people I know and the people that I wanna be most like, so actually, yeah, when you start celebrating each other, you attract all the women into your life that are doing the exact same thing and then you all thrive and grow together.
Sebastian Naum (00:17:19) – Or at least authentic success.
Megan Lane (00:17:21) – Yeah.
Sebastian Naum (00:17:22) – Yeah. Yeah. So speaking of authenticity, , it’s just a, it’s such a buzzword, right? It’s overused, overused, but it’s so important. If you can actually achieve that, what, what does it mean to you? What is authenticity to you?
Megan Lane (00:17:36) – Mm-hmm. . It’s, it’s just the raw truth of who you are in every moment. And it, and actually owning it, being okay with it and being like, Hey, look, right now I’m feeling really nervous, or I’m feeling really anxious, or I’m feeling really confident, or whatever. It’s whatever you, whatever is showing up for you in a moment. Just to be with that and be open with it and be vulnerable with it. Um, it’s like, when I think of authenticity, I think of like taking off all the masks. And that’s been like my big journey is like taking off the masks, taking off the filters, taking off the editing apps, taking off the people pleaser, mask, taking off anything that makes me feel like I have to perform to be liked or to be loved or to be approved of. It’s like stripping all of that away and being like, Ugh, this is me.
Megan Lane (00:18:26) – And I’m not perfect. I’m messy and I’m human, but it’s me. And I own that. And there’s so much power in that. It’s so sexy. It’s so magnetic. It’s so just, you just wanna be around people like that. You, you know what you’re gonna get. They’re never gonna surprise you. They’re never gonna manipulate you. They’re never gonna lie to you. Like they just are who they are. Yeah. And it gives you a permission slip to do the same thing. Right. And it’s so cool when you’re in a room full of people who are all really authentic, you know, like how your nervous system feels in that space. It’s like, oh fuck, I just get to be me here ra. Rather than being in a room where everyone’s pretending and putting on, you know, yeah. Some kind of performance or struggling with their own self-worth and it needs validation. And you can feel the energy in a room like that around those people. And you start to question like, um, am I, can I be here? Am I good enough to be here? Do I need to pretend? And you start to like put your own masks on as like a protection. You know,
Sebastian Naum (00:19:20) – Sometimes I think about this, this whole subject, and I think about as a leader being a leading position mm-hmm. sometimes they’re also, at least in my opinion, is a sweet spot of mm-hmm. , how much you’re showing or, you know, telling the whole world about when you’re going through the shit. Mm-hmm. . And so sometimes it’s okay to, maybe you can keep some of that shit to yourself. Yeah. And then when you’re gone through it, or maybe when you’re coming out on the other side or when you’re come through sharing that experience and being like, oh yeah, you know, I was, you know, this was scary or I was going through this and this is how I was able to go through it. I think it’s a choice. You can choose to share all of it as is happening and you can choose to also hold back.
Sebastian Naum (00:20:04) – And I don’t, in my opinion, I don’t think that that’s necessarily a bad inauthentic. Right. It’s just a strategy that sometimes, hey, if you’ve got, you know, uh, 10, 20, 50, a hundred people counting on you, maybe at that moment they don’t need to see that you’re afraid. Like, I’m thinking like, maybe even like in sports, right? You’ve got the, the captain, he’s going into the fi final fourth quarter and maybe he’s scared as hell if he tells this whole team that he’s super scared, everyone’s just gonna get like down. Right? So maybe that’s the moment. So maybe you have to pick and choose sometimes. Right?
Megan Lane (00:20:37) – 1000%. And I guess that’s what I learned to do as well was like, because I used to come on, I used to overshare and that again, oversharing in the name of authenticity was just a wound for me because it was me showing up. Cause I was like, I need that connection. I need to vent, I need to tell everyone. Um, so I overshared because it gave me validation and I connected in that way. Yeah. Cause I was not for myself. Right. So I was calling it authenticity at the time, but I was really just kind of like word vomiting and offloading online. Yeah. Um, and now I’m going through stuff and I absolutely hold it back. But I, but again, coming back to the sweet spot, how much do I actually hold back too much because I’m afraid of what people would think. So then I lose the authenticity because I’m putting on this kind of like, cuz I’m a coach, I have to have my shit together and yeah, I’m fine, you know, I’m doing great. And if, if I wasn’t doing great, you wouldn’t trust me. So then you lose yourself there. And it’s like, okay, so where do we find this? Like,
Sebastian Naum (00:21:33) – Once again, the sweet spot.
Megan Lane (00:21:36) – This is the title for the episode. Yeah.
Sebastian Naum (00:21:38) – . Find Your Sweet Spot. I just started watching. I don’t watch a lot of stuff, but I started watching this show called Shrinking. Have you heard of it? Mm-hmm. So, but yeah, that’s basically the, the theme. It’s a, it’s a comedy and about, um, shrinks, it’s about it’s therapists and how they’re just going through so much shit and it’s just sort of like this, you know, as a coach or a mentor. It’s a, it’s tough, you know. Um, Megan, one of my favorite current subjects, you know, playing big. You often talk about playing life big and taking a bigger role in life. How can you explain what that means to you and how you encourage others to embrace the mindset of playing big?
Megan Lane (00:22:15) – Yes, I see. I really think that this concept came to me the more I pondered death, . So it’s like I went through this time where I was very afraid to die. Um, and I went deep into the subject of, of death and like what that means to me and why I’m so, why, why I was so afraid of it. Um, and I did a lot of meditation around imagining myself at the end of my life. And I just think that it gave, it gave me the most incredible perspective. I think when you’re young, you kind of forget that you’re gonna die . It’s like you just live as though, you know, every days are given, everything’s promised, like life’s just gonna go on and on and on, and it’s never gonna end. And you just have this kind of like, no awareness of like this having an expiry date, like this is gonna end one day like this whether we, you know, have more lives after this.
Megan Lane (00:23:10) – So we’ve had more lives before. I, I feel like, in my opinion, in my, my belief is that this one right now is the one that you’re in and you’re not gonna have this one again. Right. So I think sitting with that, it was like, so meditating on like, okay, so between the, the moment that I’m born and the moment that I die, what is this in between? What am I supposed to do with this in between? What’s the meaning of it? And it just, I just really felt this like explosion of expression, like to fully own every gift, every fear, every story, everything that comes up and comes through as part of the narrative of your life. To just own it and use it and do good with it and play big. Like, I don’t wanna sit on the sidelines of my life and watch it pass by.
Megan Lane (00:24:05) – I don’t wanna be like a, a fucking extra character in the background. I wanna be the main character of my own life. I wanna like, do shit that excites me and scares me and creates memories. And I wanna feel things so deeply. And like, whether that’s the, the more heavy, difficult end of the spectrum of emotion or it’s the, you know, pure bliss and love. Like, I wanna feel all of it. I wanna feel the full spectrum of emotion as deeply as possible and make peace with that because that’s living, that’s big, that’s deep. Uh, and I, that’s what I, I want for people to kind of experience. And I know that on a human level, it’s very difficult to play big in a world where nobody, nobody really feels safe to because there’s so much judgment and there’s so many people telling us how to live and how to act and how to be, and you know, there’s just all of this outside noise, especially now, especially with like, cancel culture and the way the world has gone online, the amount of self-censorship that’s going on.
Sebastian Naum (00:25:09) – Yeah.
Megan Lane (00:25:10) – People are just scared to speak. I’ve had it, I have like a few months where I was like, I don’t wanna say anything. Everyone’s getting canceled. I don’t wanna speak anymore. Yeah. I just don’t want any part of this, this toxic culture.
Sebastian Naum (00:25:20) – Right.
Megan Lane (00:25:22) – So yeah, I see it a lot and I think that it’s a huge thing for a lot of people. Like I’ve seen two of my friends recently who were incredible women terrified to start their own podcast. They’ve both done it now. Um, yeah. But like terrified to like, go online and speak and use their voice and voice their opinions in case of how it will, how will it be received? Yeah. Like, what are people gonna say? How could my words be twisted? Like there is just so much pressure and it backs us into this corner where we end up being like, do you know what? It’s safer for me to just shut up, sit down, play small, get on with it, settle for, you know, a mediocre existence where everything’s just fine. Yeah. Uh, I won’t bother anyone. I won’t ruffle any feathers. Um, and I just think that I would get to the end of my life at that point and be like, fuck . Damn, why did I do that? , I wish I’d just lived a bit bigger.
Sebastian Naum (00:26:15) – Yeah. There’s a, um, I, I like that idea of, of coming to terms of death, looking at the end of your life. Uh, there’s actually a great Jeff Bezos quote, I’m not, I’m not like the biggest fanatic of Cha Bezos or anything like that. But, um, he was a long time ago, he was on Oprah a long time ago. I don’t know if this was like 10 or 15 years ago, but basically he just says that he lives by his own method that he calls, calls regret minimization. And he just looks at the end of his life and he looks back and he thinks I want to live by having the minimal amount of regrets. And it’s so ideally none. But that’s almost impossible. But, so just anything, if you think about, am I gonna regret not trying this? Then you just try it like bottom line. So that I, I love that concept. Um, playing big for me.
Sebastian Naum (00:27:07) – I think it sometimes can be feel very overwhelming because for me, playing big typically goes along with setting these massive goals. Right? So like playing big is just being this huge, you know, influence, inspiration, uh, um, operating up my full potential. Which by the way, there’s a concept recently that I’ve been playing with about potential versus capacity that I’m really, really into. Mm-hmm. Uh, but so how do you feel that, how do you feel about that? About playing big and then sort of setting these massive goals that feel so hard to reach? Where do you start when people have these sort of massive goals? How do you start so that it’s not overwhelming to want to play big and want to start to play big
Megan Lane (00:27:49) – ? Yeah. I mean, I feel like when I think about playing big, it’s not set like I do set the goals for myself, don’t get me wrong, but it’s like on a day-to-day basis, like, how can I show up more fully for myself? How can I play bigger in this moment? How can I make a choice to stop scrolling and go do something that feels good for myself? Like, these are like micro choices throughout the day where it’s like you get to just play a bit bigger, be more present, feel more fully, be more honest. Like, that’s where I would start with that kind of, I think again, getting into like the really big goals and stuff, which are amazing, but we all know what happens when we get overwhelmed. We end up playing small cause we freeze. Right. I do that. If I set a too big a goal for myself, I go into complete freeze meltdown mode.
Sebastian Naum (00:28:37) – Yeah.
Megan Lane (00:28:38) – Um,
Sebastian Naum (00:28:39) – Such an interesting little example you just gave of stopping to scroll right now and doing something that I know that I should be doing or what to be doing. Yeah. Like that’s a form of playing big. That’s interesting. I I honestly hadn’t thought about that. I just thought that that’s just a form of discipline. But I
Megan Lane (00:28:55) – Think expansive, if you think about the word expansive, what can I do? When I think about big, like playing big, it’s like, what is the most expansive option available to me right now?
Sebastian Naum (00:29:07) – Mm-hmm. I love that. I love that. I was mentioning the whole capacity versus, um,
Megan Lane (00:29:11) – Yeah, go on. Tell me
Sebastian Naum (00:29:13) – . What’s that?
Megan Lane (00:29:14) – Tell me about it.
Sebastian Naum (00:29:15) – Yeah. Capacity versus potential. Now I’m blanking over. Gosh, I wonder if that came from that same book that I was talking about that I was gonna quote, but, um, potential is overwhelming as hell. Potential is like, what is my ultimate potential? It’s this far away thing and I’m only gonna reach it when I die because then I reached my full potential. Right? Like, nobody reaches their full potential when they’re 25. Right. I mean, I guess you could be like, okay, messy just won the world cup. Like, and he’s got all these things so when he retires, he’s achieved his full potential, but not really. Right. Because at the end of the day, there’s all these other things in his life about him, you know, being the, the father that he wants to be throughout whatever it is. Right. So, um, potential is very overwhelming and it’s scary.
Sebastian Naum (00:30:00) – It’s like, how the hell am I gonna reach my full potential today, , it’s just one day. Yeah. So it’s like, what is my capacity? What is my full capacity? So I think that I like combining it with some of the words that you talked about just right now though, of, uh, maximizing, what did you say? Expanding, right. So it’s like, how can I be? Yeah. So it’s like what is my full, like my most expanded capacity for today or at this moment? And that’s a beautiful way to play big. That’s a form of playing big without the massive, huge goals or the potential down the line when you know when, when you’re, when you die or something like
Megan Lane (00:30:34) – That. Right? Yeah, yeah. Exactly. And like, another way of of looking at it is like, for me it it, I mean, it goes like you were just saying, it goes Yeah. He, okay. So there’s also the element of fatherhood and how can he play big in that area and how can he deepen his presence in, in that part of his life. But also, like, you know, there is, there are these moments where you might choose not to do the thing that would feed your success externally, but something that’s for more for yourself. Like counseling, doing something that we would be seen as successful, but you actually chose to do the expansive thing, which was to come back into time with yourself and do something self-loving, you know? So it can both, it can work both ways. And I think you have to be careful not to see playing big is this constant game of like success, external success, but also like internal success. You
Sebastian Naum (00:31:32) – Know, playing big can be going into the bathtub and reading a book or meditating. Mm-hmm. definitely hadn’t thought about that that way. , I’m gonna be playing big all fucking day now.
Megan Lane (00:31:48) – That’s
Sebastian Naum (00:31:49) – Great. You talk, you also talked about playing big in terms of being of service to others. And that’s a concept. It’s like, how can I serve, how can I serve? I’ve read that a lot. I’ve heard that a lot. How can I serve? It’s actually a little bit, it’s some what challenging sometimes to me to continually think about how can I serve mm-hmm. Because there’s these concepts that, um, that are maybe are just there from forever of serving, being the sort of servant like thing. And ser being a servant is low, is not plain big. Mm-hmm. . So this concept is serving of being a service is an interesting way to con tie that to plain big. So mm-hmm. give it to me.
Megan Lane (00:32:30) – Okay. , . I mean, I feel like what that brought up for me just then when you said that was the people please stuff where it’s like, and I spoke about this recently, it’s that there is such a big difference between when you think of serving and giving, giving from love because that’s who you are. And it’s a natural, it’s a natural extension of the love that comes from within you, from your life force, from your gifts. And then there’s giving for love giving because I am empty and I’m unworthy unless I am giving. You know, that’s when we overgive that’s when we step into that servant mode where we actually abandon ourselves. We forget about our own needs, and we spend our entire lives giving ourself away at the expense of ourselves. So that’s like this overgiving energy and what it really comes from is low self-worth.
Megan Lane (00:33:17) – So it’s like, if I give to you, then you give me some worth. You give me something back. Like there’s this kind of like valid out external outsourced validation of giving. So when you give from love because that’s who you are, it’s, there’s not really any, I mean, in my experience, there’s not really any effort involved. You know, you’re just being you and, and who you are as a person who is full of love and full of, um, just this kind of like generous, overflowing energy. Like who you are will be of service to people without you even realizing you’re doing it just by being who you are.
Sebastian Naum (00:33:58) – I love that. That’s a great test then. Right? That’s a, a great way to test for yourself of does this giving feel like a drag and is it cr like killing my energy? Right. Um, you know, sometimes like it br it sort of brought me back to being a kid and I think about it, right? So sometimes you like get forced to go do some sort of, do good thing to go volunteer for something or give back. And how a lot of those times, those ended up being moments where they ended up being great and you felt good about it and all that. And then other times it was a drag. So it’s just interesting and maybe that’s just what it’s not. Maybe that’s not the service type of thing for you or for, for me. Right. And it just depends finding that, that one that actually gives you energy. Yeah.
Megan Lane (00:34:44) – Yeah. And that’s very personal to you, right? The way that you love to give will light you up in ways. Like there’s some, sometimes there’s certain things that I’ve given and like, it’s brought me to tears and I’m like, ugh, giving in that way makes me feel so alive. And like the, that I got to help this person feel this way because of what I gave is the biggest reward in the whole, nothing feels better than that. And that’s very individual to the person. You know, we can’t do, we can’t give everyone everything all the time. Um, and like you said, like there’s a huge difference between someone telling you to go and do something and give from that place. Especially, you know, when you think about the upbringing with church and being told to go be a good person, you know? Yeah. You like, don’t sin, go and do good things and be a good person. This is the external pressure on it to be like to, to do good because then you’ll, oh, I don’t know what go to heaven or whatever. .
Sebastian Naum (00:35:33) – Yeah.
Megan Lane (00:35:34) – So, well, it’s a selfish giving.
Sebastian Naum (00:35:38) – Yeah. Interesting. There’s a, you know, studying in psychology, I, I cannot remember what the name of this is, but there is that concept that, um, literally everything you do is selfish because no matter what, if you’re doing something to give someone to someone else, it actually feels good for you. And then therefore it’s selfish . It’s a weird way to think about it, but, uh,
Megan Lane (00:35:59) – It’s true.
Sebastian Naum (00:36:00) – But that’s true. Yeah. But anyways, um, and there’s actually a lot of science behind, um, sort of get kind acts and kindness to others about how to actually releases serotonin and dopamine and all these beautiful things. And so it’s like legitimately healthy to give and to be kind and to be good
Megan Lane (00:36:18) – To people. Thousand percent. I think that happened when I was, um, sorry to interrupt you. Um, but I was going through my big healing journey around my disorder and things, and I remember some, I read it in a book or someone told me, I can’t remember, but they were like, stop focusing on you and go focus on other people. And it was one of the best things I ever did. I made a whole project out of it. I was like writing reassuring notes to people or leaving them on benches. I was tying me and hanging it from a tree. I was like, I was like the random act of kindness. Queen . Yeah. And obviously like there, there is a selfish side of that because it made me feel amazing and I kept doing it and yeah. Um, but also, you know, there is that feeling of like, who’s gonna find that note and who’s gonna find that money and maybe they really need it and it’s gonna brighten their day. And like, that is the ultimate, I mean, what’s that saying? Like, I think it was Wayne Dyer that said like, we come to the earth with nothing and we leave with nothing. So our purpose in this time must be to give ourselves away. Right?
Sebastian Naum (00:37:13) – Huh? Yeah. That’s a beautiful quote. Yeah. I have a good, I have a good friend, her name is Megan Sin. She’s actually been on the podcast a long time ago. And, uh, she’s like, yeah, like he’s, she’s like the, the queen of like random acts of kindness and does all kinds of stuff. And a lot of it is just very much tied to mental health. And it’s like, you can be feeling when you’re feeling down, like if you’re really feeling down, like go out and do some random acts of kind of see what that does for you. Yeah. So it’s so powerful. So I’m gonna read a quote from that book because it keeps coming up apparently. Um, I thought it wasn’t gonna come up till now, but it’s already come up, but, so this is, um, so here we go. Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Sebastian Naum (00:37:50) – Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous, actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your plain small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure about around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. So that is for Miriam Williamson, a Return to Love, and it’s just the best fucking quote ever. And so
Megan Lane (00:38:45) – So good. I feel like that quote just embodies everything that I done all
Sebastian Naum (00:38:49) – Every, so Megan, how are you going to be playing bigger over the next 12 months?
Megan Lane (00:38:55) – Oh dude, it’s so funny that you literally just read that quote because I was sat doing a full moon ritual with my friend. Um, luckily a lot of my friends are coaches, but my friend Wendy’s an incredible coach, and I was sat with her the other night and I was like, Ugh, I feel so stuck right now in my career. I feel like I’m on the brink of something and I don’t know what it is yet. And I feel like this, what I’ve been doing so far is like run its course and there’s something new that wants to come through. And I, and I’m so overwhelmed by trying to figure out what that is. And, um, we did some WhatsApp journaling and coaching
Sebastian Naum (00:39:31) – Together,
Megan Lane (00:39:32) – . And um, we, we dug and we dug and we dug and we found that like my biggest fear is success. Like it really scares the fucking shit of me. I’m not gonna lie. Like it scares me. And I’ve had book deal offers and so many things that I, that I know I could be doing, like you were saying, like how, how your potential is so overwhelming. Yeah. Um, even the thought of like doing, starting to do paid ads and scaling my business and things, I’m like, me really? Like what , I can’t imagine this to myself. Like I’ve been just sitting in this comfort zone for so long and doing well with it, but I’m at a point where it’s like, let’s expand. Um, so right now, this is a good question. It’s very relevant right now. Um, I
Sebastian Naum (00:40:16) – Had to put you on the spot at least once.
Megan Lane (00:40:18) – Yeah. You have, you have, I properly put you on the spot right now, . Um, but I, I I guess it’s, I guess for me right now, there’s gonna be a lot of surrender because I feel like recently I’ve been like a mad scientist in a lab trying to figure out what’s going on with me and like, yeah, who am I supposed to be and like, what am I gonna do next if it’s like me just kind of like trying to figure it all out. And actually there is such a really distracting, micromanaging energy about that that actually pulls you away from, um, the answer, which is definitely found in surrender and stillness and silence and flow and, um, receiving, you know, I’m not letting myself receive the answer cuz I’m too busy trying to figure it out.
Sebastian Naum (00:40:59) – Yeah.
Megan Lane (00:41:00) – So right now I know that there’s a big expansion coming, um, and there just seems to be this big question mark over it all and I don’t know what to do next. So I think for me right now, I’m, I’m gonna go into a time of like surrender, probably less time on my phone, less time just being distracted, less time scrolling, less time kind of in Instagram and in social media and like posting and things and actually take a bit of time away and be like, okay, next level requires a new meg, let’s let her come through. I don’t think that these new versions of us can come through when we’re so fucking distracted.
Sebastian Naum (00:41:42) – And that’s tough, you know, especially for you because you’ve filter brand and your business and a lot, most of your success has come around great content and, and, you know, giving people great, valuable content and uh, it’s so exhausting and overwhelming to create Yeah. And put things out all the time. Right? I mean y you know, because e even as, even as a creator, even if you have a full-time team of people helping you out, which is awesome and amazing, um, if you know one can get to that place, it’s still you and your voice. And so you still wanna make sure that it sounds like you, so you’re still going back and forth and curating and revising and posting and then there’s so much energy and you wanna be authentic. So the bigger the audience you have, you want to be responding to your audience and into the comments and oh my God, I just wanna throw my phone into the ocean, you
Megan Lane (00:42:33) – Know? Yeah. That you’re in my head right now. Yeah,
Sebastian Naum (00:42:36) – Yeah, yeah. I can only imagine. You know, and so yeah, I feel you. So that, that’s a good way to, that’s a way for you to be playing bigger is to maybe so slow down on that sense and, and, and listen, you know, we can get a real woo woo on this if we really want and be like, what is your human design? Let’s say what is, what are you, what are you, what is your human design?
Megan Lane (00:42:55) – I I’m a manifesting generator.
Sebastian Naum (00:42:57) – Yeah. So same. So basically, yeah. So the idea there is, I just did a full on thing with this. So the idea there is actually allowing things to come to you and you are sort of this Yes, no, yes, no, you know, and, and also by listening to your gut way down low and being like, yeah, this is it, or no, this is not, when you’re doing and doing and doing, it’s frustrating, it’s overwhelming. And so
Megan Lane (00:43:21) – Maybe I should look more into my human design,
Sebastian Naum (00:43:24) – some of, some of my listeners like, what the fuck are you talking about? Yeah.
Megan Lane (00:43:30) – This is Holly anyway, .
Sebastian Naum (00:43:32) – Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But yeah, so if anyone out there listening, this is actually quite interesting to look into your human design and actually try to learn about it and see if it, if it resonates, it may not resonate. If it doesn’t resonate, throw it away, whatever. But for, for me, it has helped because it has reduced a little bit of that anxiety of being a doer and being like, huh, maybe that’s not in my design to be constant doer. It doesn’t mean you sit on your couch, it just means that once you allow something to come in, it fits a fuck. Yes. Then you do and you go and you act. But as opposed to just constantly doing, doing, doing, doing to find
Megan Lane (00:44:06) – That’s true. Yeah. That is so true. Yeah. Yeah. I’m gonna look more into it. You’ve inspir,
Sebastian Naum (00:44:13) – . Um, so Megan, the, you know, the most common way for people to aim to make more money and have more abundance is simply by working harder and implementing hustle mentality. Essentially hustle, hustle, outwork everyone at all costs. Forget about mental health, forget about health, and you know, basically be on the verge of burnout because the end justifies the means. Mm-hmm. . So what connection do you see between prioritizing mental health and wellbeing and finding our authentic selves to make more money and generate more abundance to create a better life for ourselves than those around us?
Megan Lane (00:44:48) – Oh, this is such a funny subject for me right now because I’m in that process of going deeper into those layers because I did a lot of my work around my money beliefs, um, okay. Many, many years ago, cuz I was broke when I first moved to London, I was so broke. I actually remember lifting up the sofa looking for coins by food. Like really . Yeah.
Sebastian Naum (00:45:11) – Wow.
Megan Lane (00:45:12) – Don’t get me wrong. I could, you know, I’d, I’d kind of exhausted asking family members and friends to borrow money and stuff. So there was, you know, I’ve never not had people around me. Right. I, I’m still privileged, but there was, you know, there was moments where I was too afraid to ask for more money. So I’m like searching for coins and
Sebastian Naum (00:45:28) – All also for, for Americans to understand at that time there was some seriously valuable two euro coins. Just, just wanna throw that out there.
Megan Lane (00:45:36) – Hey, we not euro so I, oh,
Sebastian Naum (00:45:38) – Sorry. That’s right. Pounds even better. So with inflation, our coins in the states are nothing
Megan Lane (00:45:44) – . Oh really? Okay. Yeah. They were those still. But yeah, that was like a really low moment for me where I was like, oh my goodness. And I, and I went digging into my money beliefs and there was this belief of like, you know, you, the harder you work, you have to graft. There was so many beliefs around, um, you know, yeah. All just those, I can’t even go into how many negative money beliefs that I had, but I’ve done a lot of healing from that. And then I, I then built my wealth and I built my abundance and I was doing so well and I was like, I’ve cracked it. I’ve done it. I’m so good at this. Like, um, and it was so empowering, especially because I was a single mom and I was really learning how to receive money and have this beautiful relationship with money and love money and celebrate money and be like, I, I’d actually say like, I love money and money’s amazing and that not feel like confronting or like yeah.
Megan Lane (00:46:41) – Cringe as a woman as well. Like, we haven’t had the same relationship with money as men. And you know, when you imagine a rich person, immediately when I imagined a millionaire, it was a, a a middle-aged white man, you know? Yeah. So it’s like, there, there was so much more to unpack with being a woman. Um, and I was really proud of myself, but there was an element that I hadn’t kind of paid much attention to, which was the holding of it. Like, I was really good at learning how to relax around money and knowing that the more authentic I was and the more I was myself and the more I did what lights me up and followed my excitement, the more natural abundance would come from that. Like, it was like as soon as I stopped doing things that didn’t light me up and I followed the path path, which scared the shit out of me.
Megan Lane (00:47:30) – And don’t get me wrong, there was moments where I was like, is this gonna work? I don’t know. But I stayed with it and I, and I, um, you know, eventually you get to that point where you’re like, ah, I do get, I can get paid to be me. Like I can get paid to do what lights me up. I can get paid to, to be fully in my passion and naturally that’s where I’m gonna make the most money because I’m in my most abundant self. Um, but yeah, for me it was last year when I was, when my accountants fucked up and I was like, well actually, you know, my accountants did fuck up, but also I fucked up because I wasn’t paying attention to what my accountants were doing. So there was a lot of stuff around like, um, ir being irresponsible around money and, and then now all of this kind of stuff around holding it and managing it and understanding it and not ignoring the tax bill and not being like, ah, it’s just not for me.
Megan Lane (00:48:17) – You know, it’s just like I can make it and I love it, but actually doing the numbers and the financial stuff, like, I’m gonna ignore that stuff because it’s just, yeah, I’m, and it’s not for me. So, you know, the journey of abundance, the journey of, um, learning how to make and hold and build wealth rather than just make money and spend it, you know, actually build wealth has, is an ongoing big journey. So, you know, I can’t really speak to you in a like, super reflective state of like, I learned all of this and it was amazing and now I’ve got this like really stable like wealth situation going on and I’m thriving. I’m like, I’m still learning, I’m still growing and it’s hard. It’s hard. Um, but I think I definitely believe that abundance comes when we are most in our power and most authentic and most in alignment with what our sole purpose is.
Sebastian Naum (00:49:13) – Yeah. And that doesn’t, and it’s not related to working harder
Megan Lane (00:49:17) – Or harder. No. Well, no,
Sebastian Naum (00:49:19) – You can work, I mean, sometimes you have to work harder on certain things when you are aligned, when you feel aligned with it in purpose. But just to work harder for the sake of it. No, uh, it doesn’t work. Yeah. I actually had a, that you remind me, I had a, a great lesson from my pops early on in my entrepreneurial journey, which was he’s like, you need to learn to love taxes. I was like, what ? That’s, I hate taxes. That’s the worst of those forms. He’s like, so you don’t have to learn the forms. Like you, your accountant can do that, but understand as much as possible about it. Cuz you more you understand it, the more you’re gonna master it. You’re gonna be able to keep the most amount of money and invest the most amount of money. You’re gonna end up having taxes. It’s so freaking weird. And now I do, I actually do, which is really weird. I’m like, I actually kind of love taxes. I do because I’ve learned to really work it a, in a, in a legal manner as much as possible to make the back of it. And it’s just funny. Yeah, yeah,
Megan Lane (00:50:15) – Yeah. I remember one of the beliefs that I had was like, don’t make more money cuz then you have to pay more tax
Sebastian Naum (00:50:21) – . That’s so crazy. Yeah. Like, I’ve got some, yeah. Some people are like, oh my God, I paid, you know, $200,000 in taxes. I’m like, well then you made a million dollars. Like, that’s amazing. Like, don’t complain. Pay more tax. You wanna pay more taxes so that you can make more money, but then also pay the least as you can within. Yeah. Be
Megan Lane (00:50:41) – Clever.
Sebastian Naum (00:50:42) – Exactly. Um, what about fun, Megan, you seem to have a lot of fun. How important do you think it is to implement fun into work, into life? Is there a connection there too with, with your little one that taught you to have more fun in life? Because being a parent can be so serious and challenging and, and overwhelming. So, fun work, being a mom.
Megan Lane (00:51:04) – Yeah. Fun is just, I mean, what is life without fun? What’s the point? You know? Yeah. I really do feel like it’s so easy to fall into this trap of taking life too seriously and constantly stressing and constantly worrying and constantly trying to get it right. So much that life just passes you by. You forgot to fucking laugh. Like you forgot to have a good time. You forgot to stop taking everything so seriously and actually just be in the moment. There is so much joy in the moment. There is so much joy available in the present moment and not in like a toxic positivity kinda way, but like, genuinely when you can get into that mindset of just letting things be and just knowing that things are gonna take care of themselves, the amount of joy and fun. And actually I do find that the more I’m in my drawing, the more I’m in my fun, that things take care of themselves a lot quicker.
Megan Lane (00:51:51) – You know, you remove yourself from the stress and the anxiety and you go, okay, I’m just gonna tap out of that energy right now and just go back into fun and have a good time. Forget about it. I’m gonna go, like this weekend I went to a fairground with my daughter. And like, you just get lost in those moments where you just being silly and joking and laughing your head off. And, and, and also like, when I think about all my favorite memories in life, it’s where I’m like laughing my head off with like some of my closest friends and family. Yeah. You know, they’re the best moments. They’re the ones that stand out to me the most, like the fun times. Um, and, and, and also like when you are a person who is very, um, cares about the world and wants to make a difference, and, um, you are, you know, passionate and you’ve got a mission, you’ve gotta be careful that you don’t get so sucked into the seriousness of all of that, that you forget to just have a good time.
Sebastian Naum (00:52:45) – Yeah. That can be really easy to, that can happen really easily because the mission is so important and the mission itself can be very serious. Be challenging that sweet spot again. Mm-hmm. , you know, how do you get to that sweet spot of still having fun if the mission is serious? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. Yeah. Um, so it’s funny when you said that, like the, the quick thought of some of the best moments for me when I, that that came, it was most of the ones that I saw really fast were these sort of massive moments of connection to nature and sort of the, the awe of nature and grandeur and the connectedness with, with nature for me. So I need to, I need to, I think I need to go go on another trip soon.
Sebastian Naum (00:53:26) – . Yeah, yeah, yeah. every, every time I, when I see people that I have that I don’t see like every week, um, they’re like, how have you been? You’ve been traveling all over. I’m like, really? I have. I need to, I need to go again. planning another trip. Um, so I’ve seen you have the Thrive Project, the blank page, you have retreats. Um, do you wanna share a little bit about any of these projects so that what really lights you up? What are you doing with them? How are you making a difference in people’s lives of these projects?
Megan Lane (00:53:57) – Yeah, sure. I mean, the Thrive Project was the first course that I ever created off the bat. Mm-hmm. my own spiritual, I really, my spiritual journey was like, you know, at that point it was kind of like, I wanna say, I mean it started before the, the moment there was like little bits in Bobs that I was like reading about and stuff, but I, there was years and years and years of this spiritual journey that I was like, God, I wish someone would condense this down for me into a course because it would be so much easier to be given the bits that work, the parts that, that really land and really resonate and really do change your life and then just leave all the rest. So that’s what I did with the Thrive Project, and it was very much a channeled course. I think that was one of my first experiences of like proper channeling where I was like, this is, we’re getting a bit woowoo now.
Megan Lane (00:54:42) – Um, but this is like, so people gonna be like, what? Um, but this is so beyond me. This is just stuff that wanted to come through me and again about how may I surf. You know, that that whole energy of like, there is a message that wants to come through and that cause Bill itself, it was, it just built itself. I was just, it was like, I wasn’t even there. It just came through and I wrote it and then I videoed it and then I did all of this, the meditations and everything for it. And, uh, the feedback was like, just unreal. I was like, I can’t believe I created that. And I can’t believe people having these results from it. And I can’t believe that I’ve managed to package up my spiritual growth experience and put it into a 10 week course of people to change their lives like that rather than like, medium over years. So that was really cool. So
Sebastian Naum (00:55:26) – Cool. Really
Megan Lane (00:55:27) – Cool. That was really cool. Uh, and then there’s the, the blank page is like my new thing. I’m trying to not do the whole, I’m a, I’m an Aries and I have a d h adhd, so I love to jump around and make new things like new shiny things. I constantly doing new things and new courses and new and I’m trying to like hone in on the blank page and make that my, my thing because it’s just great. It’s for anyone that’s feeling stuck and like really in that space of like stagnant. And, and you know, it’s funny cuz I’m in that right now and it reminds me that
Sebastian Naum (00:55:58) – , it’s for you .
Megan Lane (00:56:01) – Um, but it reminds me that those moments in life can happen over and over and over again. You know, even just every death and rebirth kind of portal that we go through is going to, there’s gonna be some stickiness there. Um, and what we really need in these moments is to come back home to ourselves and reconnect with the part of us that is infinite and, um, unchanging so that we don’t feel stuck. And that’s what the blank page does. It brings people back into their power, aligns them back with, it also gives them this like a deep self-assessment of like, who am I now? Because I think that we clinging to old identities so, so heavily that we actually forget, not forget, we actually, um, just feel too way too scared to embrace a new version of us. So the blank page takes people on a journey of like, okay, but who are you now? Like, what are your values now? Like, what have you learned and what are you gonna take from that? And what can you shed and let go of so that you can step into who you’re here to become? Um, so that’s just a fun one. Yeah. What was the other thing? Overtreated?
Sebastian Naum (00:57:07) – I was gonna say to that, you know, it’s, I, I, one thing that was a major thing that helped concept that helped me get unstuck Mm. Um, was this idea of being able to change all the time. Like, I can, I don’t have to be the same person I was last year. Yeah. And I don’t have to be the same person I was a month ago. In fact, I don’t have to be the same person I was last week or even 15 minutes ago. Yeah. Because you just, you can just keep changing. Right. It doesn’t mean that you’re just like sort of this back and forth. Like you say one thing and then another, and then you just don’t even, you have no, like, there’s nothing to you, you know what I mean? Like there’s nothing that you believe in. Yeah. But in terms of growing, you have the, the full capacity and permission to continually change. And, um,
Megan Lane (00:57:55) – We forget that we have choices. We get so stuck in autopilot that we’re like, uh, it’s yesterday becomes tomorrow. And then, you know, that cycle. Yeah.
Sebastian Naum (00:58:03) – Well, well it’s also a fear of judgment I think too, of the people that we know and our friends and this and that. It’s like, what are, who are they gonna think I am? Like, oh, you’re not the same. You know, you’re not you, you know, you’re not though. Well obviously I’m not college sub, right. like, right God. Um, but uh, yeah, it’s just think it’s an interesting thing. People are just so afraid to change. I think mainly because of what are people gonna think about me? They’re gonna think that I flip-flopped. They’re gonna think that I’m being inauthentic because I’ve changed. And being authentic is you actually stepping into that change and owning it.
Megan Lane (00:58:33) – Yep. Exactly. Sweet spot again, .
Sebastian Naum (00:58:37) – Yeah. What about these retreats? What are they like?
Megan Lane (00:58:40) – God retreats is just like, uh, I remember being on the last retreat and just being like, this is it. This is what I wanna do. This is me fully. Because I think with Covid what happened was I got so stuck in behind the screen situation that I kind of felt like I lost my real life, um, communication skills. Like I really, I really did, it was so funny. I used to work in a hotel behind the reception and I cannot tell you being on reception every single day and talking to people constantly. Like, I just got so good with people in real life. It just came so naturally to me and it was just so easy. And then I remember after Covid just being like, like choking. Like in the middle of a conversation being like, what do I say and how do I act?
Megan Lane (00:59:21) – And um, so stepping into retreats after Covid was like a huge deal. Cause I was like, this is, this is scary. Like, being in front of people in real life. I dunno. My, my coaching career really took off through Covid and that was all webinars. Um, and online, yeah, online. Zoom, zoom, zoom, zoom, , the zoom line. But retreats are just, man, there’s something magical happens on retreats. There’s just this safe space that’s created and there’s such a container cuz you know, it’s got this, you’ve got a whole week in the sunshine for a start, which is great for anyone who lives here because it’s just, you know, the sunshine does magical things when you live in the clouds, . So, but yeah, you can take them on a real journey and they’re surrounded by other women who are in the same boat as them. And they, they, a lot of women that are my age, you know, in our thirties, late twenties, early forties, really struggle with making friends, really struggle with community. Again, the sister women is a big part of that. Um, but just even going up to another woman and being like, Hey, you wanna be friends, wanna hang out, wanna go do something together? But in a retreat setting, you just become like family. So it gives them that as well, which I just think is magic.
Sebastian Naum (01:00:36) – Well, I was gonna move into my last question, but I, you said something that triggered another question. So , now I’m gonna ask you, first of all, that sounds amazing. That sounds like beautiful retreats. This, this whole concept of community, community has been a word that I’ve just been hearing so much over the last few years. In fact, uh, with one of my best girlfriends, we, we kind of, we joke about it, it’s like we, we make jokes about it because we just see that in, in some senses there’s a lot of fake community, just like there’s fake spirituality. And so, and community can turn it into cliqueiness very easily sometimes and it can sort of throw back into these sort of old school, high school vibe of clique type stuff. Yeah. So like, what is, what is community to you? What, what is community when you’re talking about these, building these communities with women, what, what does it mean to you? What is a true community?
Megan Lane (01:01:26) – I think it’s safety is the main thing that comes through to me. And I think when you talk about the cliqueiness, that’s something I experienced at school and that’s why I’m so passionate about not having that in my spaces. And I’m very about that. I’m like, you know, we are not here to leave people out or not here to make people feel less that I’m like, I remember one of my like core most horrendous memories was being at university and somebody kicking me out of a party in front of everyone. Like every woman on silent. And this girl was like, nobody wants you here, you have to leave. Oh. Oh. And I was just, this group of people just rejected me completely and I really wanted to be friends with them. And
Sebastian Naum (01:02:03) – That’s like a movie, like it got silent and she kicked you out of the party.
Megan Lane (01:02:08) – Yeah. Whew. I know, I know. It was all,
Sebastian Naum (01:02:11) – I had a very similar, but it was, mine was one-on-one. It wasn’t like, you
Megan Lane (01:02:15) – Know, oh, okay. Yeah. One person
Sebastian Naum (01:02:16) – That’s not even
Megan Lane (01:02:17) – All the people, just something different to you, you that stayed with me.
Sebastian Naum (01:02:19) – Oh man.
Megan Lane (01:02:21) – Yeah. That was really hard. Really, really hard. And I had actually not done anything wrong. Like I hadn’t Yeah. Done anything. And, and there was, there was no part of me that deserved it, you know? So it was hard. Um, but, but because of that wound, and it still hurts now talk about it. Um, but because of that I am very, very, it’s safety, it’s feeling seen, it’s feeling heard, it’s feeling safe to be vulnerable. And again, masks off. I always say like in circles when we do women’s circles, like masks off everybody take your mask off. Like there’s, you don’t have to be anyone else here. Yeah. And it’s so healing to be around people that don’t judge you. Like no judgment, no judgment. We’re all human. Um, if you don’t wanna be judged, then don’t judge others. And, um, and notice when you are as well. Um, so yeah, that’s the, for community for me, it’s like, uh, everyone’s on the same level. There’s no hierarchy, there’s no no comparison. There’s just this big open loving space. Um, and everyone’s invited and everyone’s included and everyone’s accepted and everyone’s loved. Nobody gets kicked out. .
Sebastian Naum (01:03:26) – I love it. I love it. Nobody gets geeked out. . I love it. I love it. Megan, what are two, what are your top two, uh, traits that a conscious leader and must embody?
Megan Lane (01:03:37) – Um, I think I’m gonna say integrity. Integrity. Because it’s my number one value in life. And by that I mean like be a living, breathing, embodiment of your own message, you know, and when you are not because you’re human and sometimes that might happen, like call yourself out on it and course correct so that you are back in integrity. Um, and then I think kind of what we were touching on before, like that sense of like waking up with this feeling of this is my life is bigger than me. You know, it’s like, um, this is saying that I love, which is leave people better than you found them. And I think that there’s just something so beautiful about coming to this earth at this time and being in this life and being like, I wanna leave this place better than I found it. Um, and in every interaction and every person that works for you in every thing you do in your business, like how are you leaving people and the world around you better than when you found it?
Sebastian Naum (01:04:47) – I love it. That’s beautiful. Well, Megan, you are truly a conscious leader, so please
Megan Lane (01:04:52) – Thank
Sebastian Naum (01:04:53) – You. Yeah, absolutely. . Thank you. Anyone listening can check out, uh, Megan on social. We’ll have all the links in the show notes, uh, to the blank page or treats, all that fun stuff. So, uh, thank you so much for being on Megan, and uh, keep doing you.
Megan Lane (01:05:10) – Thank you. I will. You too.